Day 36: Greener pastures
I remember that i made a post way earlier called “moving on”, so i had to come up with a title that was synonymous. All things considered (I seem to love using that word), i did a pretty good job. The word “Greener” is a bit ironic though. Since Deviantart is a green site.. So you know.. Yea.. Hehe.
So what now, Jenna? Why move on? Move on from where? Well, tomorrow’s monday, and yet another week of calling places start. It should be fun though. I’m considering giving plenty of places calls. Should be a lot of fun actually.
But i think i need to address some future plans. I came across a quote by none other than Salvador Dalí. It reads:
“Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings”. That quote spoke to me, so i decided to read up on the guy, and i got very fascinated with the man. Needless to say.
I’ve been writing about this quite a bit before, but i need passion. I need a driving force. I went on for so many years with one i thought was what i wanted to do (Gameprogramming), and now i don’t have it anymore. One measure i’ve taken to change things around is gradual change in my behavior (Which would happen anyway, obviously. But i’m thinking more along the lines of a consciously changing my habbits for what i think is the better) and getting more social. It’s worked pretty well so far with the whole stress thing, and i have gotten some good feedback from both hospitals about my leg, and the empolyment offices ‘n’ stuff! But enough about that.
I have some ideas and thoughts. For one, i want to delete my deviantart account. I’ll complete the work i promised i would do for some people, and wrap up the whole thing after that. Just be done with it. So i’ll make three pics this week, and delete the account at the end of it. A way to move on, and change things around, i think. I chose deviantart because i haven’t really gotten much out of being a member there in ages, and it feels like it’s time to move on from that site.
Then i had a good idea on a certain letter i posses. A letter i haven’t read since i got it initially. A letter from someone i used to love dearly, and the only one i’ve ever loved. I still have it, because i haven’t figured out what to do with it yet. I wrote a little about her before. The one who wrote the letter, Vanna. But now i’ve figured out what to do with it! As soon as i get my own place, and start living on my own, i will burn it up. I will make a video, explaining the whole story from my perspective, burn it up, delete all the stuff from those times, and just move on. I feel like it would be a great thing to do. Because i reminisce on the good times from those days more than i would like (Mostly because i tend to listen to music from then). But i’m leaving everyone who is reading this out in the dark now. It will all become clear in due time. There will be a lot of blogging and video’ing about it, for sure.
But that’s about it. A way to close that chapters and move on. Some future plans to close the days of old. Symbolically, for myself. I think it will feel great.
So yea! Basically what i’ve been doing today. Thinking of that. I played some more modern warfare with my little brother.. And that’s about it. I need to get back into Mario and Luigi. Still in the tutorial parts of the game.. You know.. Slow beginning is always the worst. I had the same thing with Golden sun too. So i have to chug along.
I can’t remember if i showed these guys before, but they really are some of the most passionate gamers i’ve ever seen: