Day 28: The ravages of time
I just watched the majority of the movie “mr.bean” with my mom. In all honesty, we watched it mainly because there was nothing else on. Don’t get me wrong. The movie is funny and all, but we’ve both seen it plenty of times.
I should say that the movie is a guilty pleasure for me. It’s very lacking in so many ways, but overall, you can get some good laughs out of it. Mostly because i like mr.bean. Watched all the skits. British humor when it’s actually good. Like most of the monty python stuff, bill bayley, dylan moran, etc. Might sound like there’s a lot, but let’s be honest.. British humor is mostly kind of lame. But you know. Perhaps i haven’t seen much of it.
At any rate. It’s been yet another lazy day. Never ended up going to my brother or anything. I figured he’s most likely preoccupied with diablo 3, still. That game was released at a bad time in my life actually. Because at the moment, i don’t feel an urgent need to play it. I loved the second one to death. Played it more than i’d like to admit almost. But yea. I think i will just stay at his place for a few days next week. Maybe 2 or 3 days. We’ll see. Even though doing so might feel a little bad at first, i know that in the end, it’ll be good for me.
I thought earlier about friends, and hanging out with them, and i thought about being a woman. One of the reasons why i feel so awkward hanging out with people is because i never feel like i can be myself. In all honesty, i’m pretty limited in how i can dress and be at the moment. My mom recommended to me many months ago that i should probably not live as a woman while i live at home, because dad is apparently upset at it. Normally, i would just say “fuck him” and all that. But i feel obligated to follow the rules of this place. I sadly have to do it. I mean.. I really have no other way to go.. and.. it’s a little more than just that too. But i don’t want to write too much about that at the moment. If this internship and the school thing goes as planned though, i might be able to fullfil my dream, and get to live as a woman 24/7. So that’s great.
Let’s see.. I helped my sister with some stuff.. Played a lot of golden sun again. I’m about 1 or 2 more days from the end of the game. We’ll see. Kind of don’t want to rush it.
Listened to a TAM speech that Hitchens made before. Great to hear him speak. It brings me to another thought i had today, about poetry and great English linguistics. There is a character in Golden sun who’s very poetic in the way he talks, and when he explained that a ruler (Or rather, a significant character in the story) died, he said that “He’s succumbed to the ravages of time”. That’s just beautiful to me. I wish i was a good enough writer to come up with lines such as that. I have noticed that my English has improved over the years. Quite extensively too. For obvious reasons, i guess. But it leads me to my ultimate conclusion.. I need an actual goal in life. I haven’t had a goal in ages. Since i gave up on my childhood dream of making games. Cause i noticed i didn’t like making games.
So i guess the goal for now will be.. Get a goal. Do something! Strive to be something extra in one subject, rather than focusing on none.
Anyway. I’m running long on this post. Overall, i’ve been feeling alright today. Kind of getting ready for what Monday and the next week will bring.
Oh, and tomorrow’s draw Mohamed day. I want to make a picture of Jesus and him holding hands. Just a simple pic of them as BFFs. Sounded like a good idea. I think i’ll do that tomorrow. I haven’t been on my big PC for ages, so i haven’t been doing much drawing.
Laughed pretty good at the end of this cutscene actually: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kj4o8sTps34&t=21m56s You won’t regret watching it!